With
summertime finally here, we often find it much easier to engage in activities
with our children. Outdoor activities
are a great way to promote attachment.
What is attachment? Why is it
important? How can we do more of it?
Attachment
is the connection found in the main relationships in a child’s life. It is most effective when it occurs with
parents. Children and parents are meant
to form attachments with each other.
Studies show that infants prefer their caregiver’s face and voice more
than any other sights and sounds.
Attachment
is important because it can build resilience and trust in your child. A child who is secure in his/her attachments
are more likely to stay away from addictive substances, abstain from impulsive
and dangerous behaviors, and include his/her parents in choices and goals. Additionally, a resilient child is able to
ride through the storms of life with confidence and skills that build his/her
character and contribute to strength and courage.
Building
attachments with children is rather easy.
To quote the words of a poem from an unknown author:
I
tried to teach my child with books.
He
gave me only puzzled looks.
I
used clear words to discipline,
But
I never seemed to win.
Despairingly,
I turned aside.
“How
shall I reach this child?” I cried.
Into
my hand he put the key:
“Come,”
he said, “Play with me.”
Children
love to play. So put your phone and
devices away! Engage in wholesome family activities such as swimming, riding
bikes, walks, basketball, tag, board games (NOT video games!). Promote activities that build trust through
safe touch, eye contact, and soothing gestures such as mirroring (copycat),
piggyback rides, and peek a boo. Let
Google give you hundreds of ideas, and get out there with your children and
attach!
Very Young
Trauma Survivors: PTSD and the Role of
Attachment https://www.ptsd.va.gov/public/family/very_young_trauma_survivors.asp
Five Attachment Based activities to Strengthen
Parent-Child Bonds https://pro.psychcentral.com/child-therapist/2014/08/5-attachment-based-activities-to-strengthen-parent-child-relationships/
Liz R
Harding, LMSW