Do we really need boundaries in our lives? The answer is yes. Boundaries are essential to healthy relationships and a healthy life. Although at times establishing boundaries and limits in our lives can be tricky. It is a vital part of many different aspects of our personal, familial, and professional lives. Here are five different ways we can begin to implement boundaries in our lives.
First we need to identify what our limits are and understand how this effects us. We need to identify physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual limits. Second we need to tune into our feelings. Discomfort and resentment are red flags, or cues, that we are letting go of our boundaries. Third we need to be direct when establishing boundaries. Fourth, give yourself permission by identifying fear, guilt, and self doubt which are big potential pitfalls. Boundaries aren’t just a sign of healthy relationships. They are a sign of self respect. Give yourself permission to set boundaries and then work to preserve them. Fifth, practice self-awareness. If you notice that you are not sustaining your boundaries you may want to ask yourself, “What’s changed? What is the situation eliciting that’s making me resentful or stressed?” We can then identify what we can do about the situation and what we have control over.
Boundaries increase our ability to be empowered which in turn help us to lead healthier and happier lives.
April Moedl LCSW